Updated January, 2019
Are you sabotaging your success? If you’re an entrepreneur struggling to reach goals, push past limits, and accomplish anything you set your mind to, this may be the one thing standing in your way.
While self-sabotage can take on a variety of forms, one constant is fear. And as a driving emotion behind self-sabotage, fear can be a very powerful motivator.
Whether it’s the fear of learning something new, taking on “one more thing,” or the dreaded imposter syndrome, the result is always the same.
If you allow fear to take root, it will fester, sabotaging your self-esteem, productivity, efficiency, peace of mind, and overall success.
If you’re ready to stop limiting your success, here are 4 ways to find your focus, face your fears, and embrace opportunity.
4 TED Talks That Will Help You Stop Sabotaging Success
What is fear costing you? According to a study on Fear and Entrepreneurship, it’s costing you more than you might think.
Fear, if left unchecked, becomes a major psychological barrier. It inhibits risk-taking, decision making, and problem-solving, keeping you in a constant internal “tug-of-war.”
IT’s a state that cements you in inactivity, stealing away opportunity and keeping you from truly embracing the possibility in and around your business. So where do you begin to overcome its clutches when it begins to take hold?
Right here…
1. Diagnose Your Fear
If you find yourself in the self-sabotage boat, you’re not alone. Fear is a very real emotion that either pushes you forward or holds you back within business and life.
The bad news is that fear if allowed to grow, will only strangle and eventually squelch your efforts altogether.
So as an entrepreneur, how can you avoid the ugly consequence of debilitating fear? You first need to know what you’re dealing with.
Do you fear:
- The unknown?
- Making a mistake?
- Losing money or time?
- Making the wrong decision?
- Letting others down?
- Losing out to your competition?
- Embarrassment?
- Hard work and no payoff?
- Learning something new?
- Being rejected?
- Losing someone’s respect if you fail?
In this TED talk, Luvvie Ajayi shares 3 questions to ask yourself when facing fear, encouraging everyone to get a little more comfortable with being uncomfortable.
2. Embrace the Fear
As an entrepreneur interested in building a successful business and strong personal brand, taking a risk can be downright scary.
There’s no doubt that making a bold or “unpopular” decision as Erika Napoletano calls it in her TEDx talk, is not for the weak of heart. It takes resolve and a desire to stop wasting time (and brain cells) on someone else’s version of your success.
Only those who never risk a thing ever avoid failing at anything.
Do you want to be the person sitting on the sidelines, idly watching as opportunity passes you by? Or would you rather be the person taking control, making decisions, and entrenching yourself in the belief that you can and will succeed at anything you put your mind to?
I’m guessing that decision is a no-brainer. 😉
3. Stop Focusing on Fear
If you’re familiar with the phrase, “thoughts determine actions,” then you know the power these two have to shape and mold your future. But it’s not just your thoughts and actions, but your lack thereof.
If you could stop focusing on your fear today, what would you accomplish right now?
- Give a speech
- Launch a new product
- Write a book
- Double your team
- Start a new company
As Tim Ferris shares in his TED talk, “the hard choices — what we most fear doing, asking, saying — are very often exactly what we need to do.”
In his talk, Tim encourages you to fully envision and write down your fears in detail, in a simple but powerful exercise he calls “fear-setting.”
So what would yours be? Because sure, you could live a safe, comfortable, albeit fearful life.
But I’m betting you’d prefer to be bold in your thoughts and actions. To begin, identify what’s holding you back, then put a plan in place to tackle it, and from there take steps towards it every single day.
The flip side of that is complacency and sadly, it’s easier to accept than you think.
Make a commitment to kick fear and apathy (it’s partner in crime) to the curb.
4. Change Your Words
If you want to overcome your fears, change up your words. Stop focusing on the negative (I can’t) and instead focus on the positive ( I will).
In an experiment by Japanese scientist, Masaru Emoto, it was found that words not only have power but the energy to create change.
“When frozen, water that’s free from all impurities will form beautiful ice crystals that look exactly like snowflakes under a microscope. Water that’s polluted, or has additives like fluoride, will freeze without forming crystals.
In his experiments, Emoto poured pure water into vials labeled with negative phrases like “I hate you” or “fear.” After 24 hours, the water was frozen, and no longer crystallized under the microscope: It yielded gray, misshapen clumps instead of beautiful lace-like crystals.
In contrast, Emoto placed labels that said things like “I Love You,” or “Peace” on vials of polluted water, and after 24 hours, they produced gleaming, perfectly hexagonal crystals. Emoto’s experiments proved that energy generated by positive or negative words can actually change the physical structure of an object.”
Once you change your words and recognize their positive value, doors of opportunity will begin to open. Sound crazy or too simplistic? Listen in as Karen Thompson Walker shares what fear can teach us.
Final Thoughts
Fear can be debilitating. It can also sap you of the positive energy that your business needs to move forward.
I challenge you to start fresh. Wipe the slate clean and make one small decision that will propel you forward.
It’s easy to shout the entrepreneurial mantra, “go big or go home,” but sometimes the small steps are the biggest of all.
They allow us to name the fear, plan the attack, and make a commitment to finally overcoming the self-sabotage.
Nice inspiring post! I did a very good job! Thanks!
I am really impressed along with your writing abilities
its very nice
its very infomatics web like that
Rebekah – Thanks so much for all of the kind words and for sharing my TEDx talk with your audience. It’s funny, isn’t it? No matter now many times we talk about overcoming fear, we face that EXACT situation every day: should I or shouldn’t I? My life’s become a much better place since I learned to walk through fear instead of dodge it like a pile of dog poo on the sidewalk.
Cheers!
Erika
Everything seems infinitely easier once we decide to stop running and embrace it for what it is, doesn’t it? Although, some of us are quicker studies than others and figure this out without as much heartache.
But, it’s all a process and I’ll take the growth that comes from each of those fear based moments that produce an awesome opportunity to take “the road less traveled” and come out a better person on the other side.
Thanks for always being an inspiration Erika!
Hi Rebekah,
Excellent! Face, embrace and release your fears. Then move onto faith-filled, inspired acts.
I find myself repeating this process many times; all part of growing, and pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.
Awesome share! As I can see from the Share count above too 😉 Thanks!
Yes it is and it’s all a part of our own personal journey Ryan.
If we weren’t “failing forward” on a consistent basis, what good would our time on earth be? It’s all a process to be better and do more! 🙂
Great article Rebekah – I very much like point 4 “Eliminate the word ‘Can’t'” which I differently coined during a workshop back in late 2008, “Fallen out of my vocabulary have “giving up”, “concrete”, and “plan”.
Seems like I wasn’t out of tune, and five years later Facebook brought Guy Kawasaki’s comment about your writing back into awareness what is idling in my mind, and actions since then.
PS.: Right in the starting of the financial crisis late in 2008 I moved to another city, started as freelancer on process improvement, embracing a personal change.
Isn’t that fascinating Ralf! It sounds like you’ve seen a lot of change, but got out of your own way and landed on your feet.
I love to hear that and those little things like Guy’s post that brought this topic back around for you. Very cool!
Loved it…Have gone ahead n shared it with possibly everyone who tells me to stop being direct 😀
My learning to be polite lessons ended before getting started 😉
Thank you so much Annuradha!
Seems like everyone is on the same wave length this morning. I’ve read three articles that all talk about the same thing. 🙂
Fear is definitely a motivating factor in many people’s thoughts in terms of success or failure. Great tips on what to do to stop sabotaging ourselves and our businesses.
Great post. Thanks.
Barbara
Isn’t that interesting Barbara? Must be something in the air (or water). 😉 Thank you so much for stopping by!
This is my favorite line: “Only those who never take a risk
avoid failure.” Those who never take a risk also avoid greatness
and tend to live safe, mediocre lives. If I have to choose between
mediocrity and failure, I always choose failure. Because yes,
failure feels bad momentarily, but it’s also a great motivator to
keep pushing forward until you succeed. And it always feels better
to fail at something big than to succeed at something trivial. If
you fail when you take a big risk, you still get to feel the joy in
knowing you took a risk and faced your fear, even if you did end up
falling flat on your face. That joy is always worth it to me.
Thanks for the inspiring article, Rebekah!
We seem to be two peas in a pod Katherine. I have always felt far more comfortable living outside of my comfort zone than just getting by.
Here’s to embracing fear and doing those scary things that bring us closer to success. Whatever that looks like.
Definitely two peas in a pod, Rebekah 🙂 Could not be more happy and grateful to have met you. Here here to embracing fear and taking the risk to succeed!
I am also implementing some big changes in my blogging life I have been avoiding! Seize the day – right with you Wade.
Seize it and make it happen Ashley!
Ah shoot, I guess I’ll have to do it now! I have been afraid of putting my ebook on Amazon for fear I’m not popular enough to even make a difference. Per your suggestion, I will now go create my ebook on there.
Good job Wade! Go for it!! Manifest your reality.
Good for you Wade! You have to put yourself out there to see the type of success you’re looking for. It’s scary, but always exciting!